I Want to be a Hero (Chp. 36)

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"Kairi!" Sora's footsteps away from me pound in my head, so loud I nearly collapse at the sound. "I finally found you.." His hands touch her skin, and his arms wrap around her. What was this feeling? My throat was burning. Heartburn? No, surely, I was going to puke.

"Sora?" My eyes are like a doe's as I stare at the two. The beautiful red-headed girl in his arms looks to me, then up to Sora again with a curious look.

"She's no one, don't worry about it." My chest constricts. His hand lifts her chin up to his level, and my vision blurs as his lips brush over hers lightly. I was going to puke, I could feel it. What was I doing here?

The sweat rolling down my forehead forces my eyes open with a gasp. A dream. Just a dream.

He was beside me still, sleeping peacefully and nesting his face in the loose strands of my hair. Now was not the time for nightmares, or for jealousy. Could I fall back asleep without another dream? I couldn't get my mind off of that scene. My skin crawls at the thought of Sora touching her.

She is not me.

My heart can't slow down, but my eyes close again in hopes of a sleep with no dreams.

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"Two Twilight Towns?" Sora stares at the screen, confused. "I guess that means trouble, let's head in then?" The rest of the group nods. I sit simply in the pilot's chair, hands folded in my lap and eyes stuck to the floor. My dreams haunt me like nothing else has ever before. When I close my eyes, all I can see is her reaching up for his kiss, pushing on her tiptoes like I have always done.

But she is not me, and she'll never be. Is that a good thing? I know that by now, I should have some sort of faith, but the more I think about it, what if everything changes once she's back in the picture?

She's new and she's beautiful, and Sora hasn't seen her in nearly 2 years. She could be a lot different than he remembers, what if he falls.. back to her?

"What's wrong?" Eyes open. Don't close them again, no matter what. You're not that tired, Rea.

"Just a little sleepy." She tore me from my sleep over and over again last night. I want to tell you, I want you to comfort me, but how many times can I keep throwing this issue at you until you get sick of me?

"Well, you should perk up soon, Rea! Today seems like it's gonna be a pretty big day!" He can see through me, but offers me that trademark smile anyways. "I'll go make you some tea, maybe that'll help. Why don't you go put your shoes on?" I give a small nod, rising from the chair and retrieving my boots from beside the door.

She doesn't, can't possibly, love him like I do. She can act like it, maybe, but she will never be the same. Maybe they've never fought, or cried together, or got angry together.. maybe that's an ideal 'perfect', but that's not what love is. Could she possibly make him feel as wanted as I do? Can she offer everything I can? Who does he see when he closes his eyes? Her, or me?

Because she is not me. Does that make a difference at all?

"Careful, it's hot." I don't remember reaching for the plastic coffee cup, or bringing it to my mouth, but the hot steam rising from the small hole nearly burns my lip.

"Right." I look down to my shoes. I guess I had tied them. I rise, following the entire gang out the door. Back in Twilight Town and still mucking over the same insecurities. Congrats, Rea, maybe you haven't really changed at all.

"Shouldn't we go to the place in the picture? That's why we're here, right?" Goofy pulls the photograph from his pocket and Sora gives a nod.

"I remember where that is, I think, let's go head over to that mansion, then!" Bricked roads, dirt paths, grassy slopes. There's pine needles scattered about the ground.

"You're spacing out." Blair matches my step. How quickly had we reached the woods? Was I truly spacing out that much? "Everything alright?" I knew I could always trust Blair, but did I want to talk about this now?

"... How... beautiful is Kairi?" Blair doesn't even recoil at the question. She barely takes a second to answer.

"So beautiful it hurts to be around her. I wasn't kidding when I said she takes all the eyes in the room. Especially back at school, there wasn't a guy who wasn't completely absorbed in her. It's hard being friends with someone who unintentionally makes you a shadow everywhere you go." A white mansion, an iron fence, and 3 unconscious bodies.

I am not her, and I'll never be.

"Hey, are you alright?" Sora shakes the boy I remember as Hayner. "What happened to you guys?" Blair's boot gently nudges Olette awake, and Donald and Goofy help Pence up.

"We came here looking for Kairi..." Ringing. All I hear is ringing and nothing else, like a bomb has just gone off beside my head. Like a gunshot reverberating through my skull, or the utter silence after the finale at a fireworks show. I hear nothing, but I still see her with Sora. I see him reaching for her chin and ignoring my existence. I see them walking away together. When my hand reaches to touch my cheek, I finally notice my eyes are closed.

I hear her name again, and I'm pulled back into the conversation. But I still don't understand what's going on. Blair sees my scared eyes and steps back towards me.

"We've confirmed that there has to be 2 Twilight Towns, and whatever goes missing from this one will appear over there."

"Like Kairi." Olette adds yet again. I give a light nod, avoiding Sora's concerned stare in my direction. A dusk heartless rises in front of me, and I summon my keyblade, but feel completely frozen in place. Something is changing. The dusk scoots closer, my heart was killing me, but my feet were already dead. A different keyblade takes place of mine. The king, in front of me, protecting me.

"I got somethin' to tell ya. I found out where Ansem is-- Ansem the Wise! The real Ansem! He snuck into Organization XIII's stronghold." Sora gives him a nod.

"And we've figured out where Kairi is! I'm pretty sure we're right." Is she still the one?

"But why did you come here?" Who can zone out when that voice is in your ears.

"Someone gave us a clue." Blair crosses her arms. "I think it was Riku."

"Me too." Sora nods.

"Well, if that's what you think, then you're probably right!" Sora perks up.

"So you mean Riku's okay?" He bounces on his toes and king Mickey crosses his arms.

"If that's what you think." Sora stops bouncing and crosses his arms.

"I'ver waited long enough, your magesty, tell me what you know!" Mickey shakes his heads and Sora pouts.

"It's not for me to say, I can't break my promise." As Sora gets a huge grin, the king covers his mouth.

"So you made a promise to him, he's okay.." Blair smiles with a foreign look in her eye. Such a tough girl looking so soft, so relieved. Sora looks to Blair.

"We'll see him again!" Blair gives him a happy nod before Hayner speaks up.

"Who's Riku?"

"My best friend." Blair and Sora finish at the same time, the implications behind the sentences different for both parties.

"Your magesty... Did you get the pouch with the crystal from Riku, and promise not to tell?" Olette's questions make Mickey more nervous, before he finally kicks at the ground.

"Gosh, guys..." Sora smiles and turns to the big mansion behind us.

"That's enough for me, let's go, guys!" He pushes open the fence, "Kairi, Riku-- We're on our way!" My feet move this time, though I feel like the living dead. My feet drag, and I nearly trip over rocks about 5 times. I stumble over rocks about as many times as I stumble over my insecurities.

The mansion foyer is huge, and things are painted white but the shadows of the day cover the whole room in a gray shade. "There should be a computer room somewhere, let's split up and look!" Blair gives me a glance before her eyes widen and she drags me to the next room over.

"Rea, what the hell is wrong?" She points to the keyblade I unknowingly was still holding. "The flowers are wilting, what's going on? Is this about Kairi?" My eyes glaze over, and I give her a small nod. She wraps her arms around me and I look at my keyblade. Indeed, the small flowers seemed to be curling at the petals, turning the whites to a disgusting shade of brown.

"I promise you, that when we do meet back up, Sora may hug her and be excited to see his friends again, but that will not cause him to pull away from you. He's not that kind of guy, and you're not the kind of girl who would let someone walk all over her like that in the first place." She pulls away and cups my face in her hands. "In your head, you see all these dark clouds rolling in, but I promise you all he sees are clear skies that you can't see. Give him time, let the excitement die down, and he will paint those skies for you." I sniffle, and I feel my face crumple in her hands.

"I love you, Blair." My knees threaten to shake, but she holds me up with another hug.

"Nothing will change, Rea." Her hand rubs softly on my back. "We all love you, and that wont go away just because an old friend comes back into the picture." She has me by the shoulders. "Now toughen up, I wanna see those fighter eyes." I give her a nod, wiping my eyes and gaining a determined look. "Great."

"We found it, guys! Upstairs!" Blair gives me a nod before we head out of the side room and up the stairs to meet everyone in the computer room.

"How does it work?" Donald stares at the computer keyboard, and we know from previous experiences not to let him near the keys.

"I can handle it." Pence takes a seat at the large chair, killing Donald's spirit. Pence presses a few buttons and a dialogue box appears on the screen. "I can't go any further without a password." Mickey looks to Sora, who taps his chin for a moment.

"The clues were the photo of everyone, and an ice cream bar." Mickey smiles.

"Ansem the Wise loved ice cream!"

"Okay, so what's the name of the flavor?" Pence has his fingers ready at the keyboard.

"Sea-salt ice cream." Pence types it in, and the dialogue box disappears. A machine near the right wall hums to life, and Sora smiles with a fist pump. "Let's go!"

"We'll be here to hold down the fort. Say hi to Kairi for us." Hayner gives a thumbs up and I walk straight to the machine, entering before Sora even has the chance to. I feel a lot like I did when I was getting sent to the grid, like my whole body was turning into tiny atoms, separated and yet still moving towards one another. When I can see again, I'm back in the same room, but no one is there. The second Twilight Town, an exact copy of the previous.

"Damn, you're gutsy!" Blair emerges after me, followed by Sora, Donald, Mickey and Goofy.

"Are we back in the same place?" Sora looks around.

"No, no one's at the computer." He looks over to the monitor.

"So this is the other Twilight Town. Roxas' Twilight Town."

"There's gotta be an entrance into the dark realm somewhere, let's see what's downstairs." We follow the king down into the basement, and in the back corner is a black and green portal. We head straight in, and we're suddenly surrounded by nobodies.

"Do not stop moving, or the darkness will over take you!" We all look around, searching for a direction or a source for the voice. I recognized it, it had only been a few days since I had heard it last.

"Get going!" Axel jumps from seemingly nowhere and slices as nobodies with his weird frisbee things. "Don't question it, just do it!" Two nobodies knock the firey headed man over, and Sora rushes to his side, knocking off the heartless.

"Are you okay?" Axel groans.

"I kidnapped Kairi... but she got away from me. After that, Saix caught her. He's a member of the organization-- Saix, got it memorized? Now go get her, he's holding her in a dungeon."

"Axel!" Yale rushes to his side.

"Yale, if they know you're helping me... they'll come after you too." The girl pulls down her hood, revealing her own firey hair.

"Like I care." She helps Axel up, and the Nobodies begin to surround us. "Though, I do think I liked it better when they were fighting for us, not against us.

"I got this, babe." He gives the girl a wink before he uses a spell that causes his weapons to spin, spitting fire in every direction, and with one final scream he covers the surrounding area in flames, removing the dozens of nobodies.

"Whoa!" Sora spouts, but Yale is down on the ground beside Axel, holding him just as she held Lyrekxs.

"Not you, too..." Her eyes glisten over, and I know those tears better than anyone. That was the pain of a heart break.

"You're fading.." Sora kneels down beside him. Axel gives a small smile.

"I guess that's what happens when you put your whole being into an attack." He laughs "Well, not that we actually have beings, right? Anyways. Go find Kairi... and also, I'm sorry... for what I did to her." He looks to Yale, who nods approvingly through her tears.

"Yale." Blair calls, and the red haired girl looks up. "Are you.. who I think you are?" Her face crumples up some more, and tears flow from her eyes.

"Yes..." She whispers. Blair nods. "But I'm not a nobody.." I guess that much should've been apparent from the tears pouring from her eyes. "Nobodies can't fall in love." Her hands touch Axel's face lovingly.

"You sure know how to make me remember it though..." He closes his eyes and cradles his head in the warmth of her arms. "Yale... I'll see you again. In the next life, I promise." Her sobs fill the air around us as Axel's body fades from her gasp.

"I'll find you." Her chest heaves. "I promise." A silence stays in the room for a moment before Yale looks up at Sora.

"It's really you then, Yale?" She rubs her eyes.

"What the hell are you doing standing there? Didn't you hear Kairi's in trouble?" She offers Sora a sad smile and he furrows his brow with a nod. He steps away from her but turns back pretty quickly.

"You should... come home." He scratches his head before turning again and taking off towards another portal. I pause for a moment, but before I enter the portal I run to the girl, giving her a hug she really looked like she needed.

"Someone told me.." She shakes in my arms, letting out quiet sobs. "That when a nobody and their heartless is destroyed, they return back to their original person, with their memories of their time as a nobody still in tact." She stops shaking for a moment. "Maybe you should try looking in his hometown, for starters."

"Why are you telling me this?" She whispers, and I remove my arms from her shoulders.

"You helped me once, in a time when I really needed it. I figured I owe you the same." I give her a smile. "Friends do that, right?" Her green eyes study me for a moment before they let some more tears flow and look to the ground.

"Thank you, Rea." I smile, breathing in deeply for what seems like the first time all day.

"Anytime." I look to the portal, and finally step in, meeting back up with the gang in what seems to be a dark back alley of a completely dark city. As my eyes look at all the tall towers and buildings, my eyes finally catch on the moon. "Heart shaped?"

"Axel said Kairi was being held in the dungeon." King Mickey gives a nod.

"Then I guess we better find a way to get over to that castle!" I follow his gaze to a large towering building just under the light of the moon, the only seemingly light thing in this place.

Our footsteps are the only noises in the city, but as we reach a rather large skyscraper, rain begins to pour down onto us. When we look up, lightning flashes in the sky. My heart leaps. Thunder, and then the sound of steel. When I turn, Donald and Goofy are knocked out. I look back to Sora. A figure behind him in a dark cloak.

"Sora, look out!" The figure runs at him, but Sora raises his keyblade just in time to avoid his attack.

"You can't be Riku.." He whispers.

"Riku? I defeated a Riku once.." A feeling comes flooding to me, I grasp at my chest. A thousand things come flooding into my head at once, tears fall from my eyes. I didn't recognize anything at first, but the pictures of a blond haired boy in my mind, then two red heads, memories that weren't mine-- but they were. Mio.

"I did something stupid." I hear her inside my head, she lets out a small laugh. "I decided to help Namine get Kairi, but uh... I got caught. So.. hear I am." I grasp at my chest, still feeling overwhelmed.

"So you... are back inside me." I nod slowly, all her memories flashing through my mind. "Okay.. Okay. wow. Roxas." I look up and see Sora fighting the figure, but his voice catches my ears and it's not me who lets out the scream. "Roxas!"

He looks to me, Sora looks to me. The hood falls off, definitely Roxas. Two faces, same expression-- same beautiful blue eyes. Same love shared between sombodies and nobodies. Roxas shakes off my calling and jumps away from Sora. In Sora's confused anger, he holds out his hand towards Roxas's keyblade, and it disappears from Roxas's hand.

"What!?" Sora strikes him down, and the girl who memories I now share jumps inside of me, my heart leaping. Roxas slowly rises and Sora's keyblades drop and vanish, and he stumbles past Sora before turning back with a grin.

"You make a good other."

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